You Can’t Turn Back the Clock, But You Can Wind It Up Again
The title of this article is a quote by Bonnie Pruden. It’s a great reminder that we can choose to be different any time we want. We just have to take one step in the direction we are seeking. Some time ago I went to visit a friend who lived in a retirement community. This was an area with beautiful lakes, walking trails, tennis courts, golf courses, boating, a clubhouse with a swimming pool and a calendar of events that could keep you as busy as you want to be. There was dancing, arts and crafts, theater, singing and concerts. I was in awe of all the fun things available within walking, golf carting or bicycling distance. Couples were out strolling together. Friends were busy chatting or going to and from activities. These communities are designed for those who are no longer working, whose children are grown and living on their own.
“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” — George Bernard Shaw
As I observed what was happening, it occurred to me that these adults were doing all the things that children are introduced to in their developmental years. Curiosity, creativity, playfulness, anticipation, excitement at discovering something new or simply enjoying something already learned are the norm when we’re young. So what happens in between the time when we are young and learning and the time when we retire and can start enjoying things we once loved again? It mostly seems to happen to married people who settle in and start raising a family. Single people still force themselves to go out and participate in clubs or social activities to meet others and be active. Couples with children start to teach them how to play different games, allow space for resting, creating through storytelling, art creations, singing, dancing, even comedy.
“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?” — Satchel Paige
It seems the gap of freedom to play and explore comes in the middle of our lives, when we are trying to earn a living, create financial wealth and what we deem to be a “secure” future. This mentality comes at the risk of forgetting to enjoy those same things we’ve been taught along the way. We get caught up in the “have tos” and the “shoulds,” the “should nots” and the “I’d like to, buts” and it doesn’t take long to realize you’re working so hard to build a life, that you forget to live the one you have. It’s good to point out that how we show up for ourselves is an imprint on the young ones we are teaching. We are the role models they have for what being an adult will look like.
“Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind.” — Luella F. Phelan
One friend recently shared how she has been witnessing her grandchildren, with whom she often gets to spend time. One of the biggest things she noticed was how JOYful they are when they wake up each morning. The enthusiasm for waking up and getting to discover what adventure the day will bring is contagious—what new revelation they’ll see or experience. They don’t wake up thinking “oh God, not another day of pressure to perform, to do or be a certain way.” Just pure anticipation of a new day.
“A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.” — John Barrymore
One way of keeping our dreams alive and filling the hole of regret before it has a chance to grow, is to take the advice of the older generations. Here are a few things they have to say to children:
Take care of your body: Eat well, exercise regularly and avoid harmful substances to ensure a healthy body for life.
Prioritize your mental well being: Find ways to stay mentally sharp, like reading, thinking, or positive dialogue with others.
Take one day at a time: Don’t think too much and get overwhelmed by the future or dwell on the past. Focus on the present moment to manage or prevent stress. Don’t worry about things that are out of your control.
Value your relationships: Maintain strong connections with family and friends who support and encourage you. Make the effort to stay in touch.
Be respectful: Treat others with kindness and courtesy, even when you disagree.
Choose your friends wisely: Surround yourself with people who have goals and who encourage you regarding yours.
Be curious and learn: Never stop learning. Acquire new knowledge and skills. This keeps your mind sharp while inviting new opportunities.
Save and Invest Money: Even if you have to start out small, start saving a little each week or month. Little habits done consistently develop into bigger things. As your money grows, invest it and make it grow even more.
Even if you forget to enjoy your life in between being a child and being retired, don’t fear. You can begin any time. As the quote says, you can’t turn back the clock but you can start from where you are and wind it up to give you momentum again. As long as you are consistent, even in tiny doses, you will keep the spark of youth in all you do.
“Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art.” — Stanislaw Jerzy Lec