Create the Life You Want
Do you live the life you love or do you imagine the life you want? If you can imagine the life you want, what are you doing to get there? Is it genuinely your version of what life can be, or is it someone else’s version of what they think your life should be?
One of the major struggles that seems to keep people complacent is not knowing what they really want. There are so many opinions and options that it can be quite overwhelming, so it just seems easier to withdraw and not do anything more than what’s absolutely necessary.
I remember several times in my life when I wanted certain things and it didn’t seem that anyone else was offering what I wanted, or making it available to me. In those moments I created what I wanted instead of waiting. One such instance took place as early as 4th grade. I wanted to perform in the theater and didn’t want to “audition,” so I wrote a screenplay from a book I’d read. I starred in and directed the production. My father helped me make the props and my grade school teacher supported the project. It was a great success as far as school attendance and the thrill of seeing my vision become a reality.
“I didn’t always know what I wanted to do, but I knew the kind of woman I wanted to be.” ― Diane Von Furstenberg
Another thought is to create micro moments that can add up to the life you want. Moments are manageable and can deliver joy and satisfaction more quickly. Each successive life moment begins to build and add to the life you want. Ideally, you want everything you do to flow from one activity to the next. If your mindset is to separate all aspects of your life then it becomes more challenging to step out of one compartment and into another. Creating space between work, home, family, friends, church social activities and such puts unnecessary stress on your mind and spirit. It is difficult to juggle so many things. If you keep all areas of your life congruent—coinciding in harmony—you don’t have to “shut down” any parts of your life to be able to enjoy another.
“Your life is a book; make it a bestseller.” ― Shanon Grey
What are micro moments? They can be the unexpected encounters with a friend or a chat with a stranger that give you a different perspective. Maybe you want to join a book club to meet people, but you only like a certain type of writing. Can’t find what you’re looking for? Start your own themed book club. You will draw other like-minded people to you. It doesn’t have to be a lot of people, just one or two.
Maybe you wish you could cook? Find a cooking class to be a part of, or host a themed cook-off and invite one other person who can invite another person and so on. You don’t have to know a lot of people to get things moving. If you don’t feel like you are interested in anything, you will have to experiment and try different things until you know for sure. Civic organizations are a great way to get involved in your community, make new friends and work on projects that can be personally rewarding. All roads lead somewhere, even if it’s to another road. You will pass people, places and things that you may not know existed before.
“I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.” ― Diane Ackerman
There was a time in my life when I wanted more connection with other couples and opportunities for being social. I decided to start a Couples Dinner Club. We chose a different restaurant once a month. I started with just a couple people I knew and asked them to invite one or two other couples that they knew. It took the pressure off of me to gather all the people and it gave everyone else a chance to have other people there that they were already comfortable with. We all got to meet new friends this way. The group was different each month, depending on who could come. We got to experience new restaurants, make memories with new and familiar friends, play games and create a micro moment for our lives.
“Do one thing every day that scares you.” — Eleanor Roosevelt
These are just a few ideas to get you thinking about how you can have more of what you want. Don’t let fear and doubt keep you from living the life you dream of. There are people out there who want to meet you, who are interested in the things you like. Another quote I like is “those who I am seeking are seeking me.” Think about that. An employer is looking for someone like you to be a part of their team. There are customers who want to buy what you are selling. There is a person who longs to have a relationship with someone like you. There is an idea waiting to be discovered. Start creating micro moments to build your life with. One day you will look around you and realize that the little joys you experience each day are all part of the life you’ve dreamed of!
“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” — George Eliot